Paper Luigi: The Marvelous Compass
by Stupidfic
Summary: an attempt to adapt Luigi's story from the game Paper Mario The Thousand Year Door
1. The Marvelous Beginning

-1It was another day as Luigi Mario was at home cooking up a snack while his brother left to once again go on another adventure. Luigi hummed as he worked in a kitchen when he heard the mailman, Parakarry, yell 'mail call!' from outside. Curious of what mail the Mario Bros. have received, Luigi checks the mailbox and finds a single letter. He opens it and reads the message.

_Sirs! My name is Crepe. I am a cabinet minister in the far-off Waffle Kingdom. Our land has been attacked by the Chestnut King, who took our Princess Eclair. I ask, nay, BEG for your assistance! The Waffle Kingdom needs your skills. I humbly request your prompt response, sirs. Sincerely, Crepe._

Oh no! Another kingdom has been under attack and Mario went off in some stupid treasure hunt!

"Looks like I'll have to save the Waffle Kingdom myself" Luigi gulped.

After writing down a note saying 'Mix a Keel Mango with a Peachy Peach to whip up a Fruit Parafait', Luigi went off to help the Waffle Kingdom.

Of course, he forgot to lock the front door, which then Bandits came inside his house and looted Mario's television set.

An hour later, Luigi was already heading towards his destination via airplane.

The Toad piloting the airplane said "we'll be arriving towards Waffle Kingdom's capitol, Pancake Palace, in a few minutes."

Luigi was getting anxious. What was the place like? Would they accept Luigi? Did they have clean restrooms? All these questions kept repeating in his head.

Suddenly, the Italian noticed something outside floating towards the plane. It appeared to be a large flying squirrel being ridden on a nut with body parts. The nut grinned mischievously and took out a bomb, throwing it at the plane. Luigi screamed as the airplane and shuddered from an explosion.

"We're hit!" the pilot shouted "we'll have to jump out or we're dead! Oh… Wait, never mind, the plane is alright, sorry to worry you sir. Sir?"

Lugi, unfortunately, took the pilot's advice and jumped out of the plane, WITHOUT A PARACHUTE!

Down below, a male and female Cupcaks (which were the Waffle Kingdom's version of Goombas) were having a romantic scene.

"Oh sweety" the female Cupcak cooed "look what I got for you!"

"Is that a hammer?" the Cupcak male shouted in excitement "oh I always wanted one of those! I love yo-"

SPLAT!

The girl looked at utter shock when a plumber wearing green landed on her boyfriend!

"Oh boy, a new hammer!" Luigi said "mind if I take it? Thanks!"

Luigi took the hammer and merrily walk off, unaware of the squashed Cupcak behind him.

"…Sweety?" choked the female.

Soon enough, Luigi was finally at Pancake Palace. The waffle people at Waffle Kingdom were light brown and had large round heads. The palace itself looked like a giant wedding cake, with it's round corner-less walls and creamy colors.

"HEY YOU!" somebody screamed. The plumber turned around and saw the female Cupcak. "How dare you flatten my boyfriend, take his gift, and walk away like nothing happened!"

Luigi stuttered "err, s-sorry."

"Sorry? SORRY? Sorry isn't good enough you jerk! HEY BIG BRO, I GOT A MUSTACHED MAN FOR YOU TO PUMMEL!"

Luigi screamed in terror as a much, much larger Cupcak came.

**BOSS: BEEFCAK**

"Ack! I have to stomp on this guy before he stomps on me!" gulped Luigi. He attempted to do so, but an unexpected spike punctured his foot.

The female Cupcak jeered "Ha! You need to watch where you jumping, moron! Come on, bro, punish him!"

The Beefcak grunted in agreement. He walked up to Luigi and head butted the plumber, causing some serious damage.

With stomping out of the question, Luigi decided to use his new hammer. He ran up to his foe and slammed the mallet down on it's left foot. The Beefcak roared in pain.

"Don't let that guy beat you up!" the Cupcak shouted "wail on him!"

The Beefcak head butted Luigi again, but this time the plumber was ready and defended against the attack. Luigi hammered the large creature's right foot and it soon fell face first.

The Cupcak yelled "get up, big bro! Get up, quick!"

Luigi took the advantage of the defenseless Beefcak and jumped on it repeatedly until he was defeated!

"NOO!!!!!!" cried the Cupcak girl "WHY DO YOU KEEP HURTING ALL THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT?! YOU'LL BE HEARING FROM MY LAWYER!!!"

The Cupcak somehow managed to pick up the Beefcak, which was about five times her size, and ran off in tears.

"I say" someone spoke "that was quite an interesting battle."

Luigi looked to notice that a fancy-dressed waffle person had watched the fight.

The waffle said "I am Crepe, the Waffler minister of the Waffle Kingdom. You must be Luigi Mario, correct?"

"You know my name?" the plumber said in shock "wow! Normally, people refer to me as 'that green guy' or 'Mario 2.'"

Crepe chuckled. "Well, strange that not many know half of the legendary Mario Brothers. It's a pity your Mario didn't come along, but at least one of you didn't ignore my letter. Come, come, let us talk inside…"

Inside the Pancake Palace, Luigi sat with Crepe and the other cabinet members of the Waffle Kingdom, while drinking fancy Chuckola Cola.

Crepe takes a sip of his cola and says "as I wrote in the letter, our most prized treasure, the lovely Princess Éclair, has been kidnapped by dreadful and monstrous Chestnut King!"

"Monstrous?" gulped Luigi "you mean, like, scary monstrous?!"

"The scariest!" answered a cabinet member "you aren't afraid, are you?"

"N-n-no, of course not!" the plumber lied.

Crepe spoke "anyways, the Chestnut King vanished right in front of our eyes, and we have no idea where he could have taken her."

"However, we do have an idea how to find her."

Out of the shadows came a man hidden in a blue cloak, with his white mustache and yellow eyes the only parts visible.

"Ah, Luigi I would like you to meet Merlon, our oracle" said Crepe.

Luigi asked Merlon "so how to do we find Éclair?"

Merlon cleared his throat, then spoke "our kingdom's most magical item, the Marvelous Compass, can help find her. You see, long before our Waffler ancestors existed, fables said the Marvelous Compass was broken into seven pieces by an ancient curse and have been scattered across the land. However, the compass's base is enchanted, pointing to the locations to the compass pieces."

"…and your point is?"

"In case of emergencies, we placed a compass piece we managed to find in the princess's tiara. With any luck if you find the pieces you'll find Éclair."

"Judging the laws of role-playing games, I'm guessing I'll have to find ALL the pieces before I find Éclair, right?"

"Possibly."

Luigi sighed, then asked "so where's the compass base?"

"Here it is!" the minister piped in, handing the plumber the compass "as minister of the kingdom, it is my duty to protect our greatest treasures, alas I could only protect our second greatest."

Luigi looked at the compass base when it suddenly glowed. The compass pointed south, while creating an image of a volcano.

A cabinet member shouted "I think that's Rumblebump Volcano! From the Pudding Continent I believe!"

Crepe spoke in concern "Luigi, if the princess is there then you MUST save her quickly! Who knows how long before she's roasted to a crisp!"

"But I don't have a way to get there!" Luigi panicked.

Another member said "do not fret, friend. We have hired a sailor by the name of Flapjack to help you. He should be by the port waiting for you."

Luigi thanked the cabinet members and went to the port. There indeed was a ship waiting for him, with the words 'S.S. Toaster' on the side. Walking into the boat, he saw a Waffler sailor also on it.

"You must be Luigi" said the Waffler "the name's Flapjack, and I'm pleased to meet anyone who can save our princess! So, where are we heading off to?"

"Rumblebump Volcano, on the Pudding Continent, I think."

"Awesome! Let me just start up this boat…"

Luigi patiently waited, then saw somebody coming. It was the female Cupcak again, and this time she brought her lawyer!

"Do it faster." Luigi said in fear.

Flapjack went "huh?"

"Do it FASTER! FOR THE LOVE OF STARS DO IT FASTER!"

Flapjack frantic tried to start up the S.S. Toaster, and the Cupcak and lawyer were coming closer. Just as the two nearly entered the boat, the Toaster started up and boosted out of the port. Luigi watched as a soaking wet Cupcak screamed in anger, seeing her become smaller and smaller as the boat moved forward until he couldn't see her at all.

Luigi heaved a sigh. "Great, the trip barely started and I've already ran away from a lawsuit."

And thus began the journey of…

PAPER LUIGI: THE MARVELOUS COMPASS


	2. Rumble In Rumblebump

Luigi was fast asleep inside the S.S. Toaster. He was having a nightmare where Waluigi was shoving him in a dirty toilet when Flapjack woke him up.

"We arrived near the Jelly Jungle at the Pudding Continent, Mr. Luigi" the Waffler said. "Unfortunately, the Rumblebump Volcano is miles away from water, so you'll have to walk on the rest of the way.

The plumber took his gear and went into the Jelly Jungle. It was a very long walk, but it took four days for Luigi to realize he was walking around a large tree the whole time, then things seemed to pace up.

But the Jelly Jungle was a dangerous place. All sorts of critters lived in the rainforest, including Fuzzys, Slimes, WereChomps, Skelo Jellos, and even a purple duck carrying a plastic bag.

"Arrr I'z gunna get u" quacked the duck.

"AHHH!!!!" screamed Luigi "WHEN WILL THE MADNESS END?"

The plumber ran all through the night. The next morning, he ended up in a place called Vorgut Village. As Luigi bought more supplies and went to continue his journey, he was tackled by a Blooper!

"I finally got you, you wild beast!" the Blooper yelled as it held onto Luigi.

"EEK!" Luigi cried "GET OFF ME! PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!"

"Eh?" said the Blooper. The white squid jumped off of the green plumber and looked at him closely before saying "hey! Your not the monster?"

"Huh?"

"Yeah, you know, the crazy screaming monster that I heard in the jungle and went hunting for the entire night?"

"Oh… yeah, umm, that was me…"

"Ah shoot! And to think I could had some fun!"

"Wait, who are you? And why were in a jungle?"

"Oh, yeah, I guess I should tell you my name. I am Blooey, but people back home call me 'White Torpedo!' I was out in the Jelly Jungle looking for some tough creatures to fight, but all I managed to find was you."

"But why would a Blooper like you be miles away from the sea?" Luigi asked in curiosity.

Blooey chuckled "because I'm tough, that's why! People back home said I was insane, walking on land more often than swimming in water, and maybe they're right! I guess that's why I left town, never really belonged there. So these days I've been traveling the world, hoping to find adventure and maybe a girlfriend. So what are doing here, mister…?"

"Luigi."

"Luigi?! Luigi as in Luigi of the Mario Brothers? Oh this is so awesome! Are you on a quest or something?"

"Yeah, just heading to Rumblebump Volcano to find a Marvelous Compass piece and maybe find Princess Éclair of the Waffle Kingdom too."

"SWEET! That sounds like an adventure to me! Let me come with you, I've been itching for some hardcore action!"

_Blooey joined Luigi's party! Luigi can throw Blooey at far distances!_

With a new ally to help him, the plumber went southwards only to find a bottomless gap in his way with a switch on the other side. Luckily, now that Luigi had Blooey, the Blooper was thrown over the gap and landed on the switch, a bridge appearing allowing Luigi to continue on.

Soon enough, the path ended up at Rumblebump Volcano itself. Thwomps and Whomps pounded the ground as lava boiled around them.

"This is going to be interesting" Blooey spoke to himself.

"HEY!" grunted a Whomp as it walked in front of the heroes "nobody is allowed to be here! Turn back now or suffer!"

Luigi responded by jumping on the Whomp and knocking it over. Blooey charged into the stone creature and defeated it. Then the two went inside the volcano.

"Man, it's too hot in here!" Luigi gasped "hey look! Lemonade!"

The Blooper shouted "NO LUIGI!"

But it was too late. The plumber picked the randomly cold glass of lemonade, which was on a suspicious stone panel. The panel rose without the glass weighing it down, a boulder fell from above and was rolling straight for Luigi and Blooey!

Luigi says "mmm, that was some tasty lemona- AHH RUN FOR IT!"

The two went high speed in hopes of not getting ran over by the boulder. As they fled, they dodged past Thwomps and Whomps, jumped over a bed of spikes, ducked under flying arrows, and broke through Grandma's giant fruitcake. The boulder dipped in a pool of magma and the plumber and his squid partner panted after their frantic run.

Then they got flattened by a giant stone foot.

"Ouch" Luigi grumbled as he stood up. He looked to see where the foot came from and screamed when he found out. It was a stomping 100-foot-tall statue!

Blooey shouted "How the heck are we going to beat this thing?!"

Luigi looked at the giant statue as it stomped around. The only thing he could find interesting was a red gem on it's forehead, most likely it's weak point. He doubt his jumping abilities could even reach that far, but he had an idea.

"Hey Blooey!" he said "see that gem on it's head?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to throw you at it because something tells me that it's weakness!"

"What if you miss?"

"Don't worry, I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Luigi grabbed Blooey and aimed while waiting for the statue to stand still. When the statue paused, Luigi pulled the Blooper back and tripped, while sending Blooey sky high! The Blooper missed it's target and landing in lava!!! Blooey screamed in agony as he jumped back on solid ground and tried to wiggle off the remaining magma on him.

"Oops" Luigi said.

Blooey shouted "HOLY BLOOP, THAT BLOOPING STINGED LIKE BLOOPING BLOOP! BLOOP!"

The plumber noticed something different and gulped "uh, B-Blooey? Your skin…"

Blooey looked down and screamed even louder. "OH BLOOPY NO! MY BLOOPING SKIN IS NOW BLOOPING BROWN! I'M SUPPOSE BE THE BLOOPING WHITE TORPEDO, BUT NOW I LOOK LIKE BLOOPING BLOOP! LUIGI, YOU SON OF A BLOOP, I BLOOPING HATE YOU BLOOP BLOOPY BLOOP BLOOP!!!"

The statue seemed to hear Blooey's foul language, and immediately attacked them!

**BOSS: GOLGEM**

Luigi and a still ticked off Blooey tried fighting the statue's feet, but the rock creature's high defense prevented them from causing any damage. The stone feet stomp on the two with each foot, and the man and squid blocked but still took damage. Luigi decided to use a POW Block he carried with him, and when it was activated the ground shaking it caused sent the Golgem into a pile of rocks!

"All we had to do was use a POW Block?" Blooey choked. Luigi noticed the Blooper was holding back tears.

But the fight wasn't over yet! The statue's head still remained, and it was very angry! But Blooey was much more angrier, and used a move called 'Torpedo Drill' and hit the Golgem's gem multiple times with one hit. The head groaned in pain, then bounced about until it bounced off of Luigi's head. The plumber ate a Mushroom as his health was low, then Blooey hit the Golgem's gem again with a regular attack. The red gem broke into tiny pieces, and the Golgem ceased to move.

"Alright we won!" Luigi cheered. He was going to give Blooey a high five, but after looking into the crispy squid's glare, the plumber decided to go into the next room instead. He checked his compass to see if he was heading in the right direction, and it pointed to an ancient treasure.

Opening the chest, Luigi didn't find any princess, but he did see a shiny shard that he believed to be the Marvelous Compass piece. Placing the piece into the base, the compass glowed in a bright light as an image of pastry-shaped house appeared while compass pointed west.

"That's Plumpbelly Village on the Strudel Continent" said Blooey, a bit amazed by the compass's recent lightshow.

Luigi said "well let's go back my ship."

The two were soon going through the Jelly Jungle. Neither of them spoke on the way, and both knew why.

After thirteen hours of walking, Blooey finally broke the awkward silence by saying "you do know that from what you did to me you ruined my life and I'll never forgive you, right?"

"Yeah" Luigi sighed "but I don't think you look THAT terrible."

They soon arrived at the S.S. Toaster, with the Waffler sailor still hanging around.

"Nice to see you again Luigi!" Flapjack spoke enthusiastically "and you brought dinner!"

Good thing the green plumber had that 'don't get killed in your sleep' badge on.


	3. Starving Snakes Slithering

-1As the S.S. sailed the ocean waters, Flapjack was trying to have a conversation with the other passengers.

"What's up with the world today?" the Waffler rambled "it seems new lands appear every single day. And don't get me started with species, I mean, how really are there?"

But to Flapjack's dismay, Blooey and Luigi were fast asleep. The Waffler sweat-dropped and decided to look outside.

"Hey! What do you know! We finally arrived at the Strudel Continent!"

The other two suddenly woke up, and were so excited they jumped out of a window and swam to shore.

"Uh, bye" Flapjack said sadly.

Luigi and his partner were soon on dry land and were following the compass's directions to Plumpbelly Village. However, they soon stopped when heard nearby explosions. Trying to find the cause of the explosions, the two looked up to see something that Luigi instantly recognized.

"That's the guy who tried to kill me on my way to Waffle Kingdom!" he shouted.

Indeed, soaring on a large flying squirrel was a bomb-touting nut. The plumber and Blooper jumped out of the way as the squirrel swooped at them and crashed into a tree.

"No, bad Spanky!" the nut rider shouted "watch where your going next time!" The nut jumped off his squirrel and faced the man in green. "So you survived my last encounter have you?"

"Who the heck are you, you weirdo?" Blooey asked loudly.

The nut glared at the fried squid and boomed "Who am I?! I am A. Scorn, commander of the Nutty Nation and loyal servant to the great Chestnut King!"

"Wait, your working with the Chestnut King?!" asked Luigi.

"Of course I am, you silly little man! The King is aware that you are trying to claim back the princess, and he has sent me to make sure you fail your quest! Prepare yourself!"

**MINI-BOSS: A. SCORN**

A. Scorn sneered "face the wrath of the Nutty Nation! AHAHA!"

Blooey says to Luigi "this is guy is nuts! Let's kick his butt and move on!"

Luigi jumped on A. Scorn twice, then Blooey tackled the nut. A. Scorn twirled his arm then punched Luigi in the face.

A. Scorn laughed "had enough yet? Too bad, I'm giving you more!"

Blooey switched with Luigi and drilled the enemy. The plumber took out his hammer and smashed A. Scorn with it.

A. Scorn cried "ARGH! I'm going nowhere with this! Time to kick it up a notch!"

He pulled out a bomb and threw at the others, giggling as they got damaged in the blast. Blooey drank some honey syrup to gain some flower points, and Luigi ate a mushroom. A. Scorn pulled out another bomb and threw it, however this time Luigi sent the bomb back. The bomb exploded and the acorn was unable to fight!

Coughing up soot, A. Scorn yelled in anger "you may have won this round, but I'll be back! SPANKY, COME!"

The squirrel flew next to it's master and the nut jumped on his pet and both took off. Luigi and Blooey looked at each other and shrugged.

Later that day, the two arrived in Plumpbelly Village. The village had pastry-like buildings, animal citizens, and a rather peculiar security force roaming the streets.

"I think something's fishy around here" Blooey said in suspicion.

"Relax, Blooey, I'm sure that just because there some tough guys are everywhere doesn't something's wrong!"

"THERE SHE GOES! AFTER HER!"

The two watched as three alligators wearing shirts with skulls on them chasing after a small pink cat.

Luigi said "it's possible she's a criminal."

The alligators were walking back, with the cat carried on one of the gator's shoulder.

The cat screamed "NO! I DON'T WANT BE A SACRIFICE!"

The alligator carrying her shouted "shut up girl, or we'll make you shut up!"

Luigi sighed "okay, maybe SOMETHING is wrong in this village."

Suddenly, a red Bob-omb with a strange looking fuse came next to the gator carrying the cat and exploded, knocking the reptile out and freeing the kitty.

One of the other gators said "it's that freak again! Get him!"

Not wanting the Bob-omb to get hurt, went and jump on one of the gators. The last gator turned to notice Luigi but was soon defeated by another blast from the walking bomb.

"Hurry, everyone!" the pink cat said "follow me before more Kremlings notice us!"

Not the time to ask questions, Luigi and Blooey followed the cat and bomb into one of the pastry houses. When they got in, the kitten immediately pushed a box in front of the door.

"Phew that was close" the cat sighed.

The Bob-omb said "yeah I know."

Luigi asked "so what's going on?"

"Man, these Kremings are getting more rougher everyday."

"Yeah, tell me about it!"

"Hey, guys, hello?"

"Thanks for saving me back there, Jerry."

"Any time, miss Neow."

"Am I being ignored?"

"So where should I hide next?"

"I dunno, let's try-"

"HEY!"

The cat and Bob-omb soon notice that they weren't alone.

The pink kitten who's most likely named Neow says "uh, can I help you?"

"Yeah" Blooey replies "WHAT THE BLOOP IS GOING ON IN THIS TOWN!"

"The village has been taken over" said a fifth voice. Entering the room everyone was in was a really fat orange cat with black stripes on his back.

"Dad!" Neow said "I thought you were taking a walk outside!"

"Neow, look at me!" the father cat said pointing to his huge belly "I can barely get to the bathroom let alone outside!"

Blooey took a few steps away from the large cat, then spoke "so you know what's going on?"

"Yes, yes I do. I'm the mayor Fat Kat, or I WAS the mayor. A couple weeks ago, a giant snake by the name of Hizza came offering a Yoshi cookie for my village, which I agreed on. Now I know it sounded like a stupid trade, but if you smelled that tasty cookie you would probably have done the same. Anyways, it seems that Plumpbelly wasn't good enough, so now he's been looking for a sacrifice for some crazy ritual or whatever. As you can guess, the sacrifice he wants most is my own daughter!"

The Bob-omb proudly interrupts "but I make sure of it that he doesn't get a chance!"

"Ah yes, Jerry. Jerry here is a very honorable Bob-omb, helping to defend my daughter. However, I don't think he can save her much longer."

Blooey then changes the subject by saying "so do you happen to know where any Marvelous Compass is, would you?"

"Compass piece?" Fat Kat asked "hmm, I believe I once heard Hizza complain about having an enchanted shard puncturing him in his stomach…"

"Well Luigi, it looks like we need to defeat Hizza in order to get the next piece" said Blooey.

"You mean you'll help us, strangers?" Jerry wondered "if your going to fight that snake then I want to come too!"

_Jerry joined Luigi's party! Luigi can set Jerry on the ground and detonate him remotely!_

"It's nice to know your going to help reclaim our home" the mayor said "but how will you get to Hizza himself? The only way to even meet him is if you were a sacrifice!"

"Then I'll be a sacrifice!" Luigi shouted.

"Are you sure?" Neow asked "there's this custom where sacrifices have to be in wedding dresses."

"Then I guess I'll have to wear a dress!"

"WHAT?!" Blooey and Jerry shouted at the same time.

"If that's what I have to do, then that's what I'll do! Bride me up baby!"

Neow took Luigi into the next room and began to doll up the plumber. Within minutes, the work was done.

The pink cat announced "presenting to you is Miss Luigi!"

And out came Luigi, wearing a frilly pink dress, fake earrings, make-up, and bright red lipstick. The other men were very, very shocked. Especially Jerry.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Blooey muttered "it's not that frightening, sissy."

"Well then, let's go get Hizza!" Luigi shouted to his partners.

The three headed towards town hall, which was now the snake's lair. As they walked towards the entrance, a elephant holding a stop sign named Pak E. Derm stopped.

"Halt!" Pak E. Derm said "no one is allowed past unless they are a sacrifice!"

"Oh, but this fine lovely… lady IS a sacrifice!" Blooey said.

"Really?" the elephant said in surprise.

"Yeah!" said Luigi in a very terrible feminine voice.

"Hmm, well that mustache is a bit of a turn off, but a sacrifice is a sacrifice! Head on in!"

The three entered inside the town hall, noticing how swampy it was. There was some burly Kremlings patrolling around, and one of them noticed Luigi and friends.

"Hey! What are you doing here?!" the Kremling demanded.

"Uh, taking the sacrifice to Hizza?" Jerry replied.

"No outsiders are allowed to bring sacrifices, especially ones that Hizza didn't request! Get 'em boys!"

Then a fight between Luigi and his partners versus a couple of burly Kremlings began. The plumber bride had difficulties with his dress, but in the end he and his friends were victorious.

The next room had a second floor but no stairs to reach it. There was a switch that activated an elevator temporarily, however the distance between the switch and the elevator was too far apart, so Luigi couldn't each the elevator in time. But Luigi then had an idea, by laying Jerry near the switch then running where the elevator. Jerry soon exploded, and Luigi was able to use the elevator to reach the next floor. On the second floor was very hyperactive Kremling girl.

"Omigosh, that dress is sooooo kawaii!" the Kremling giggled.

"Uh, thank you" Luigi said girlishly.

The Kremling soon asked "hey, like, can I have your dress? I sooooo wanna to show it to my friends back at Donkey Kong island because, like, I said I married this awesome hunk and they're like 'uh uh' and I'm like 'uh huh' and they wanted proof so if I show it to them they'll be like 'omigosh!' and I'll be like 'yeah girlfriends!' If you do give it to me I'll give this Super Hammer!"

"Umm… okay!"

"AWESOOOOOOOOOOOOOME!!! You are like the coolest person EVER!"

The Kremling gave Luigi a super hammer then skipped in joy wearing her new dress.

"Well that was strange" Jerry said to Luigi, who appeared to have been wearing his plumber under the wedding dress. (Then again, he could be in his undies!)

"This universe is always strange" Luigi muttered as he used his new hammer to break open a stone door.

Beyond the door was a large dark room, perfect for a giant snake to hang out in. Which in fact one WAS hanging out in.

"Who daresssssssssss to disssssstrub Hizza?" questioned a gigantic snake creature.

Luigi stuttered "umm, people w-who want t-to take back Plumpbelly Village."

"Ah, we sssssssssee. You want to protect the girl, yessssssssssss?"

"Yeah we do!" Jerry shouted.

"If you musssssssssst know, we have nothing againsssssssst her. But the thing isssssss, we are alwayssssssss hungry, sssssssso very hungry. Thissssssss village with food-ssssssshaped buildingsssssss attracted usssssssss. We thought if we ruled thissssss tasssssty place, we would be happy, but no. But then we sssssssssssaw the girl, the innocent little girl. Then we knew ssssssssshe could filled our appetite. Oh yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss."

"Hey!" Blooey shouted "what do you mean in 'we?' There's only one of you!"

"No there issssssssssssn't" said another snake as it came out from the shadows. It was then that they all realized Hizza had two heads! Luigi fainted on the spot. When he woke up, he noticed he was in a battle!

**BOSS: HIZZA**

"About time you woke up!" Blooey muttered.

Luigi chuckled nervously and double jumped on one of Hizza's heads. Blooey went and drilled the other. The first head bared fangs and bite Luigi who blocked it, but then the next head did the same thing and poisoned Luigi. Blooey went up front and gave his partner a Super Shroom to eat, then Luigi used an Ice Storm which nearly froze the cold-blooded creatures before the poison damaged him.

"We are sssssssso hungry!" said one head.

"Mmm, that Blooper lookssssssss tasssssty!" said the other head.

Like lightning the second head gulped Blooey in one bite!

"BLOOEY!" screamed Luigi.

"You'll pay for that, snake-creature!" Jerry shouted as he went to Luigi's side.

Because Jerry had no way to hit the two-headed snakes, he used a Fire Flower instead. Luigi double jumped on the head that ate Blooey. The plumber then took damage from his poison.

"Mmm, cherriesssssssss" drooled head number one. The head soon ate Luigi's other partner!

"NO NO NOOOOOOOO!!!" cried Luigi. Now he was all alone against Hizza! As he sobbed, he noticed a bandage on the snake's skin. Curious, the plumber whacked the bandage with his super hammer. Hizza roared in agony.

"THE PAIN THE PAIN!!!"

"DON'T THERE! THAT'SSSSSS THE SSSSSSHARD'SSSSS SSSSSPOT!"

"SPIT OUT MY FRIENDS!" Luigi shouted, now cleared of his poison.

"NEVER!" the two heads said in unison.

Luigi got bitten by both snakes, but guarded against their attacks. He whacked the bandage again and Hizza couldn't take anymore. He spit out Blooey and Jerry and his heads fell to the ground.

Blooey groaned "urgh, somehow I KNEW my fried skin would lead me inside something's gut."

"Alright, I defeated Hizza!" Luigi cheered.

However, the two heads rose back up, and looked very hungrily at the plumber. The heads reared back ready to strike, and when they charged forward, Luigi dodged left. The snakes bite into each other, which caused Hizza to poof into smoke!

"What the heck was that?!" Jerry shouted.

Luigi didn't know and didn't care, as he saw the compass piece lying on the ground. He placed into the compass piece and watched as it glowed and pointed east while showing an island with race tracks.

While the compass activated, Luigi heard a female say "Help… me…" Was that Princess Éclair. If it was, she sounded lovely!

"Luigi! Hey!" Blooey shouted while waving his tentacles.

"Huh? What?"

"I that the location the compass made is Circuit Break Island! What's wrong with you?"

"Uh, nothing, nothing, let's go see how the village is now."

Back outside, everyone was cheering as Luigi and Blooey waved to their adoring fans. As they went to leave the town, blocking there way was Fat Kat!

"Thank you for saving us, dear strangers! As a token of our appreciation, you may stay here and marry my daughter!"

Luigi said politely "thank you, but-"

"The green one has accepted! The wedding shall be tomorrow!"

"WHAT?!"

Everybody cheered in celebration, and Neow kissed Luigi in the cheek. In the Plump And Cozy Inn, Luigi and his partner couldn't sleep.

"We can't stay here!" whispers the plumber "we have a quest to do."

"Yeah" whispered the squid "plus I think the mayor wants to eat me."

So it was decided, they were going to leave. Luigi opened a window which he and Blooey would leap through.

"What are you guys doing?"

The two escapees nearly screamed in surprise, but calmed down when it was only Jerry.

Luigi whispered "don't take this the wrong way, but we have to go."

"Okay" whispered Jerry "could I come with you guys?"

"Why?" Blooey asked quietly.

"I have my reasons."

Luigi shrugged and leaped out of the window. As silent as Squeeks, the three heroes snuck out of the village to pursue their adventure.


	4. Road Rage

The S.S. Toaster arrived at it's next destination of Circuit Break Island. As the passengers got out, they heard a very loud racket. They looked to see it was coming from two speeding karts, one green kart driven by a Toad and another black kart was boxed up so the driver wasn't visible. As the karts were turning around a corner, the green one went off track and sent it's driver flying! The driver crash landed next to Luigi and slowly stood up.

"Ouch, that's the ninth time that's happened!" groaned the Toad. "Oh! Welcome to Circuit Break Island! My name's Safe T., semi-professional racer."

Luigi asked "are you alright?"

"You mean that accident?" said Safe T. "that's nothing really. When you have races almost every day here, you get used to multiple spills. So are you here to race?"

"Well, not really…" Luigi muttered.

"Ah you should, man. You get to be king for a day if win. Oh shoot, I forgot I'M in a race!"

Safe T. quickly jumped into his kart and took off. Curious, Luigi and his two partners went to follow the tracks.

"Wait guys!" Flapjack shouted "I don't want to be left alone!"

The four got to the end of the track and saw an award ceremony.

The award announcer loudly spoke "the winner of today's race is once again Turbo 128!"

Some people cheered while others booed as the black kart drove by and did a donut on the road.

"Wow I can't believe it's really the Turbo 128!" Flapjack shouted in excitement.

"You know that kart?" Jerry asked.

"Do I! The Turbo 128 is considered the greatest kart ever! It's driver is never seen, and people say the driver never even LEAVES his kart. It's truly amazing to know I'm watching it in real life!"

The announcer says "one again, our winner is king for today and will receive this fabulous trophy!"

A shiny trophy is soon taken out and place on the black kart. Luigi looked at the trophy closely and noticed something…

"There's a Marvelous Compass on that trophy!" Luigi proclaimed to his buddies.

Jerry guessed "so that means we'll need to win the next race in order to get it."

"Remember folks" the announcer shouted again "if you wish to enter tomorrow's race just sign up in our registration booth!"

The Turbo 128 was the first to somehow enter the booth then took off with it's trophy. Luigi eventually signed up and later saw Safe T.

"You signed up for the race, huh?" the Toad asked "well you'll need to be careful."

"Huh?" said a confused Luigi.

"Circuit Break Island races are a bit more extreme than regular kart races. You can hurt real bad if your not careful."

"I've experienced crazy kart races, I think I handle this race too."

"Well if you say so. You know, while we're talking about the race if I won and became king, I would try to make the races less hazardous. Such as-"

"INCOMING!" someone screamed.

A random missile collided with Safe T. and knocked him to the ground. Luigi went next to the Toad's side and saw he didn't appear well.

"I… don't think I can make it" Safe T. wheezed "please, win the race and make this place safer. Go see Torque on the other side of this island, he can… help you."

The Toad coughed once more and fainted. Luigi quietly agreed to do Safe T.'s request, but first took the Toad's super boots because he felt like it.

The plumber went to see his partners and told them he had to see Torque, and Flapjack's eyes widen in excitement.

Luigi wondered "let me guess, you know who Torque is?"

The Waffler said "Mechanic Weekly says he can do anything with his wrench! If he's here than you'll surely get something good!"

"Well what are we waiting for?" shouted Luigi "let's go see him!" The plumber was across a race track and noticed the other three weren't coming. "What's wrong?"

"Are you sure it's a good idea to be walking on the tracks?" Jerry wondered.

"It's quicker than walking around it" Luigi replied. "If you guys want to stay here, then so be it!"

The plumber turned and continued on, not noticing his partners shake their heads. It was ten minutes later and Luigi was still walking through the empty race course, wondering how big this island was. He stopped when he loud noises and wondered what they were. He screamed in fear when he found out it was high-speed karts firing weapons at each other! He ran away while trying to dodge the karts and projectiles, but was soon stuck on one kart!

"Get off my ride you pedestrian!" yelled the Pianta driving the kart. It grabbed Luigi and used it's super strength to throw the man in green out of the tracks.

Luigi screamed as he twirled in the sky, then was soon rolling on the ground before stopping. When he looked up, he was in front of a building labeled 'Torque's Garage.' How convenient!

Entering the garage, Luigi heard grunting from the other side of a kart. He decided to investigate and saw it was a green-shelled Buzzy Beetle with a wrench attached to it's shell, using the wrench to repair an engine.

Luigi spoke "excuse me, are you Torque?"

The beetle finished up working on the engine, then faced Luigi and said "yeah I am, what do ya want?"

"Uh… I really need to win the next race so I was wondering if I could borrow a kart or something."

"Don't make me laugh! I don't give away my rigs to anybody to needs to win a race!"

"But I'm Luigi Mario, I know how to use karts really well!"

"I don't care if you're a big-shot hero, you still won't get anything."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pleeeeease?"

"No!"

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeease?"

"NO! GET OUT!"

Luigi was kicked out of the garage and the garage door was closed. Luigi got on the roof and used his super boots to ground pound through a trap door.

"What the hey?" the Buzzy Beetle said in surprise.

Luigi went on his knees and cried "please let me use a kart! I'm BEGGING you!"

"Alright! Alright! You can use one of my karts, you psycho! Just get out so I can get my work done!"

"Thank you! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!"

The next day, the preparations for the race began. Torque came with a nice green kart armed with a large cannon on it's side.

"This is the Big Green 01" the beetle stated "this baby is the best ride I ever created. If you say you're a good karter as you say you are, then I expect you gonna take good care of it."

"You can count on me!" Luigi said with a thumbs-up.

Luigi got in the kart and waited as a Lakitu grabbed the kart with a fishing hook and took it to the starting line with the other karts. There was an audience sitting the stands, ready for excitement.

"Good day, race fans!" shouted the announcer on a mike "today we have another fabulous race to become king for a day! Are you ready for some crazy karting?" The crowd cheered. "Alrighty then! Racers, start your engines!"

All the racers started their karts. A Lakitu floated above the starting line with lights attached to a rod, the light currently red.

"On your marks…" said the announcer "get set… GO!

The lights the Lakitu carried turned green, and Luigi put the petal to the metal. Unfortunately, he had the kart in reverse and was going backwards, screaming along the way. He stopped screaming when the Big Green 01 crashed into a wall and went into a complete halt.

The announcer said "Ooooo! That's gotta hurt! Big Green 01 went the wrong way and ends up wrecked! Not only that, but all the other karts are wrecked as well!"

And the announcer was right. Luigi's stunt caused the drivers behind him to swerve and create a complete pile-up!

"Folks, never have I seen such destruction without the used of weaponry. Such a terrible tragedy! Even the once-invincible Turbo 128 is now scrap!"

Luigi, not wanting to give up, changed gears and pushed the pedal. Even though his ride was badly damaged, it was still functional. He took his chance and drove around the race course.

"What's this?! Unbelievable! Big Green 01 is still in the race! This event will be in history books, people, and we may never see something like this ever again! As the only working kart, Big Green 01 is declared the winner!"

The crowd cheered as Luigi got to the finish line. When he got out of the kart, he was soon hit in the gut by a shell!

"You lousy moron!" Torque shouted "look what you did to my ride! Do you know how much repairs will cost me?! I'm going to follow you until the end of time until you pay off your debts!"

_Torque joined Luigi's party! Luigi can now fix things with Torque's wrench!_

"W-wait a minute" stuttered Luigi "couldn't you just repair it yourself?"

"Maybe, but then I wouldn't get satisfaction watching you suffer!"

Luigi's other partners came, with Jerry holding the trophy that Luigi won. The mustachioed man took the compass piece off the trophy and placed in the compass base. Once again, the Marvelous Compass glowed as it pointed east with an image of buildings with flower-like roofs.

"Hey, that's Jazzafrazz Town!" said Flapjack "I always wanted to visit there ever since-"

"My love" Éclair's voice interrupted in Luigi's mind "My love….save…me."

"Don't worry princess! I'll save you!" Luigi shouted. He looked to see his friends look at him strangely. "Hehehe, uh, never mind."

Suddenly, Luigi was ran over by a speeding kart, which soon stopped. The kart was none other than Turbo 128, which was a bit banged up.

A monotone voice emitted from the kart "WINNER OF TODAY'S RACE, PREPARE TO BE ROADKILL!"

The black kart suddenly moved some parts and transformed into a robot!

**BOSS: TURBOT 128**

"Turbo… is a robot?" Luigi questioned in shock.

"AFFIRMATIVE" said Turbot "I WAS CREATED TO WIN EVERY RACE SO NOBODY COULD BECOME KING. EXCEPT NOW YOU ARE KING, AND YOU PROVE TO BE TERRIBLE BY BREAKING THE TROPHY! YOU MUST BE ELIMINATED!"

No point of working things out, Luigi attacked. He hammered Turbot, but the robot's defense was too high to do anything. Torque used his wrench to lower Turbot's defense. Turbot ran them over. Luigi ground pounded the robot then Torque used his shell to hit Turbot.

Turbot said "ENEMY IS PROVED TO BE POWERFUL. SWITCHING TO BATTLE MODE TWO."

Two cannons appeared out from Turbot's shoulders and fired two Bullet Bills which floated in the air for some reason. Luigi switched Torque with Blooey, and the Blooper tackled a Bullet Bill and destroyed it. Turbot ran over it's enemies, and the other Bullet Bill collided with the plumber. Blooey switched with Jerry, and Jerry blew up in front of the kart robot.

Turbot beeped "EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! MALFUNCTION! MALFUNCTION!"

Turbot has sparks all over it's metal body while having a bit of a seizure. Despite it's malfunction it fires two more Bullet Bills. Luigi jumped and destroyed the bullets, and tried to jump on Turbot but got zapped by the sparks. Jerry goes up and explodes by Turbot again.

Smoke came out of it's insides as Turbot said "RRRRRR CAN'T FIGHT BZZZZZZT GOING TO BREAK DOWN AAAAAAAAAGGGG HI I'M DAISY DFSGVHRFVYGCVCVCVCVCVXBGCVTDFRC!!!"

Turbot's head blew up, and the rest fell to the ground.

"Well, there goes the once great Turbo 128" said a familiar Toad.

"Safe T.!" Luigi gasped "but I thought you…"

"I had a Life Shroom."

"Oh."

"Anyways, now that your king for today, what are you going to do?"

"Well, actually, I got what I came for, so you can be king."

Luigi handed the trophy over to Safe T., who looked at the trophy then at Luigi.

"But why?"

"You deserve it. This place needs a good king, even it is for one day."

"Thank you sir! I'll make sure Circuit Break Island will be a safe yet entertaining place."

The Toad shook hands with the plumber and both went their separate ways. Meanwhile, Flapjack was collecting undamaged parts from Turbot and putting them in a bag.

"Hehe, I love foreshadowing" the Waffler whispered as he slung the bag over his shoulder and went back to his ship.


	5. Phanto Of The Theatre

-1The S.S. Toaster had arrived at Jazzafrazz Town in the Fruit Juice Continent half an hour ago. The place was glamorous and lively, and most of the popular were the flower creatures called Dayzees. Since the compass piece couldn't be far off, Luigi decided to take some time shopping for badges.

"Which one should I get? Dizzy Stomp or Sleepy Stomp?" Luigi asked his shopping partner Blooey.

The roasted Blooper suggested "neither, nobody ever uses status-effecting items in RPGs."

"Bah, I knew I should have brought along Jerry."

Torque burst in the badge shop, looking peeved about something.

"Your shopping for badges?!" the Buzzy Beetle shouted "how da heck are you going to repay me then?"

"Put a sock in it!" Blooey said "we don't go fighting creatures and collecting their loot just to pay off some stupid vehicle."

"I wasn't talking to you, fried calamari!"

"At least I'm not a shrimp like you!"

"You trying to start a fight?"

"Bring it on, beetle!"

The Buzzy Beetle and Blooper tackled each other and started rolling out of the shop, with Luigi following after them.

"Have a nice day!" said the Dayzee shop keeper cheerfully.

The two were still going at in the middle of the street while Luigi and Jerry tried to pull them apart. Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing when something swooped past them.

The plumber looked to see what it was and said "not him again!"

Yes, up in the air was A. Scorn with his flying squirrel Spanky! The nut laughed menacingly, the squirrel crashed into the top floor of a seven story building. Both Spanky and his rider fell, the acorn landing first. A. Scorn quickly stood up and pointed at the man in green.

"Your-"

SPLAT! His squirrel landed on top of him, much to his dismay. He wiggled his way off the furry critter and went back to his pose.

"Your journey ends here! I have new tricks up my sleeve and I'm not afraid to use them!"

**MINI-BOSS: A. SCORN AND SPANKY**

The acorn continued, "due to the fact I'm out-numbered, I have taught my squirrel how to fight. As for myself, I made my body harder and learned some Nutcracker Ninjutsu! Time to fall!"

Luigi charged up his hammer and slammed it on A. Scorn. Blooey leapt and collided into Spanky. The nut did a one-two punch on Luigi, and Spanky swooped into Blooey who blocked some of the damage. Luigi whacked A. Scorn and sent the nut into his squirrel, then Blooey became fireball and roasted the acorn.

"Not bad, not bad" A. Scorn panted "now it's time to show my cooler tricks. SPANKY, FETCH!"

The flying squirrel attacked Luigi and made the plumber lose his hammer. A. Scorn jump flipped between Luigi and Blooey and kicked them both at the same time, then jump flipped back his regular spot.

Without his hammer to attack, Luigi had no choice but jump on the evil acorn, which did no damage as A. Scorn's body was too strong. Blooey switched to Torque without using his turn thanks to the Quick Switch badge Luigi bought and Torque made armor to boost the plumber's defense. A. Scorn drilled kicked Torque and Spanky swooped into Luigi again, but the armor Luigi on damaged and knocked him out instead. The plumber did a power jump and it's strength was able pierce A. Scorn's defense and defeat him.

"Argh!" screamed the acorn "I won't forget this!" Because his only means of transportation was unconscious, A. Scorn grabbed Spanky's tail and walked off, grunting as he pulled the squirrel.

"Now that we whooped that nut, I remember we have a quest to do" said Luigi. The group was about to leave, but some clapping got their attention.

"Bravo! Bravo!" cheered a Dayzee with light green petals. "Such amazing moves! I'm Hayzee, actor slash director. I'm working on a musical, and your talents could help me win the next Drama Slam!"

"Err… sorry" Luigi said "We're kind of busy looking for a magical compass piece."

"Compass piece?" said Hayzee "you know, now that you mention it, I think the Dramalama Plaque you get for winning the Drama Slam might be a piece of something."

"Really? Well, I guess we could help out a little."

"Perfect! Meet me at Flora Theatre, I'll have to tell the guy who's position I want to give you is being replaced by a better actor. Ciao!"

Luigi would have went to the theatre right away, but he still didn't have his super hammer when the squirrel knocked it out of his hands, and went to look for it. The search was unsuccessful, but he did see a Dayzee hitting a pile of rocks with a much better ultra hammer.

"Stupid hammer!" the Dayzee grunted "stupid rocks! Why can't I make a sculpture of myself?"

The plumber wondered how he could get that hammer and had an idea. Picking up his buddy Torque, he used Torque's wrench to make a statue of the Dayzee with words under the sculpture written 'I am more awesome than you morons!'

"Wow! It's better than I imagined!" the Dayzee gasped in awe. "Thank you very much Mr. Mustache, now buzz off, your in the way of my new art!"

"YOUR SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME YOUR HAMMER!" Luigi shouted in rage. He used Torque's wrench to knock the statue on top of the Dayzee, then stole the ultra hammer that the flower dropped.

Now satisfied, Luigi and friends went to the Flower Theatre. The plumber found Hayzee hanging out with others who also part of the musical.

Hayzee spoke "ah, if it isn't my new rising star! I got your costume ready, and everybody else is prepared. Were going to win this Drama Slam for sure, and not even the theatre phantom will scare us off!

"P-p-p-phantom?!?" Luigi asked in fear.

"Yes, the phantom. Was said to haunt this very place, and had a deep hatred for those who were very green. But it's only a myth anyways."

Luigi screamed when a huge axe suddenly fell right in front of him.

"Hmm, that was odd" Hayzee said in confusion "anyways, put on your costume, our play is about to start!"

Luigi questioned "shouldn't I rehearse or something?"

"Don't worry about that, just get ready!"

A while later on stage, the spotlight was currently on a Dayzee. He says "this musical is called 'The Mystery of the Fiery Hat of Social Awareness', written by Hayzee the Dayzee."

The Dayzee fled off the stage as the curtains rose behind him. The set was a simple road in a vast plain. Luigi silently laid on the side of the road playing as his part, grass. Hayzee came on stage, wearing a hat with poorly drawn flames glued to it.

"I have a hat, it's on fire,

The flames are hot, I'm not a liar,

What has happen to make me scare,

Is that my hat is socially aware."

Then all of a sudden, Blooey, Jerry, and Torque came on stage, wearing regular hats.

"Why is the hat socially aware?

Shouldn't it live without a care?

Doesn't awareness bring it shame?

With it's bright glow and burning flame?"

Then multiple Dayzees and Shy Guys went on stage, dancing in a circle around Hayzee.

"Fiery hat of social awareness,

It's a mystery,

Fiery hat of social awareness,

Please make us see,

Fiery hat of social awareness,

Why do you live?

Fiery hat of social awareness,

What purpose do you give?

Suddenly, a Dayzee came wearing sunglasses and bling-bling.

"Yo yo yo,

I'm not part of this play,

I think you're all stupid,

And that's all I have to say!"

The Dayzee quickly left. A female Boo appeared next to Hayzee and kissed him.

"Oh you dear fiery hat,

I don't care if your insane,

You should know that

I love you all the same!"

The spotlight went on Hayzee as he, Blooey, Jerry, Torque, the Dayzees, the Shy Guys, and the Boo danced.

"We don't know

Why the hat is burning,

And we hope for

The truth that we're yearning,

But it's not a big deal

And we should care less

Of the crazy mystery

Of the fiery hat of social awaren-AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

Hayzee screamed in utter pain as a giant stone fell right on his foot. Luigi, lying on the ground doing his part, looked above stage and saw a cloaked person wearing a mask he remembers when he had that adventure in Sub-Con to defeat the evil Wart. The curtains closed as the audience applauded.

Later that evening, after the cast took Hayzee to the hospital, words of the musical spread throughout Jazzafrazz Town.

"We won!" the green Dayzee gave the news to the crew. "I told you it would be a success and I was right! Luigi, was it? You should have it, you earned it for such a great performance!"

Hayzee gave the mustached man the Dramalama Plaque, which was actually the next compass piece! Luigi, though, was a bit depressed. Not about the piece, but the fact he had the worst part is the entire play! But he said nothing, not wanting to spoil the moment.

"AFTER-PARTY AT MY HOUSE!' shouted the female Boo. The Dayzees and Shy Guys cheered and went with the ghost.

Hayzee spoke again "well, this was a very dramatic day. That giant stone hurt like Ztars, I wonder where it came from?"

Then Luigi remembered something! "Oh! When that rock landed by you, I think I saw the phantom!"

"The phantom?! Why would he do such as a thing like that?"

"I dunno, why don't you go ask him? He's… RIGHT BEHIND YOU! AHH!"

Hayzee looked and it was indeed the masked creature Luigi saw. It got surprised and ran off by jumping on some music note blocks and landing on a nearby rooftop.

"So the phantom is real?" said Hayzee "perfect! Such excitement is better than what I could direct! Let's go after him!"

The plumber asked "but won't it be dangerous for you?"

"Nonsense! When you're an actor like myself, it's always a good idea to train your body and learn self-defense in case your cornered by the paparazzi. You'll see, they don't call me 'The Red Miracle' for nothing!"

"But your not red…"

_Hayzee joined Luigi's party! Luigi can go faster by riding on Hayzee!_

Luigi and his partners bounced on the music blocks and began the chase! The phantom leapt on roof-top to roof-top, being followed every step of the way. Trying to lose it's pursuers, the phantom went through Jazzafrazz's most dangerous places. It ran through the Museum of Sharp and Pointy Things, the Acrobats-Performing-Over-Acid Circus, the live action set of 'Bomb-omb Battlefield 3', and the Homicidal Painters Club, yet Hayzee's speed made sure that they caught up.

The flower panted "phew! I thought a slim guy like would be easy to carry, Luigi!"

Luigi shouted "hurry, he's getting away!"

The phantom went into an alley, and when the others followed they only saw a dead end. Exhausted, everyone went to the after-party. The place was rather wild, with dozens of guests and really loud music.

Somebody shouted "HEY EVERYBODAH! IT'S THE OTHER GUYS FROM THAT PLAY!"

Dayzees cheered and picked up Hayzee, Blooey, Jerry, and Torque and tossed them in the air multiple times. Luigi was ignore so he went into a corner and cried. After a while the music stopped as the disk jockey held up a mike.

"Congratulations to all of those who won today's Drama Slam!" shouted the DJ Dayzee "This song is requested by an anonymous person, and this person would like Hayzee and his newest cast members to come up on stage."

Everyone clapped as Luigi and his partners went on stage. Orchestra music played, and the phantom appeared!

**BOSS: PHANTO**

The phantom stood straight, matching his tone with the music he sang opera-like:

"Hooray sir Hayzee, you won the Drama Slam,

You got the Dramalama Plaque thanks to your friends,

But your performance was horrible and it makes me cry,

So for your punishment, you all must die!"

Luigi quickly smashed Phanto with his ultra hammer and Hayzee slapped the phantom three times. Phanto flew into the flower but got counter-attacked.

"Your attacks are good but they are not great,

Don't bother fighting back, it is too late,

I have a power just like your host,

I can turn transparent for I am a ghost!"

Phanto became see-through! Luigi tried jumping on him, but went through the phantom instead. Hayzee switched with Jerry and the red Bob-omb lit his fuse and waited. Phanto went up to Luigi and kicked him, then Phanto's transparency was gone. Now able to attack, Luigi whacked the phantom and Jerry exploded causing massive damage to the ghost.

"Ha! Ha! Ha! This is getting fun,

But you still linger on I have work to be done,

Time is ticking slowly, so lets go see

How long you survive when I'm one, two, three!"

Two more Phantos came from out of nowhere, and they looked ready to fight! Phanto one flew into Jerry, Phanto two kicked Luigi, and Phanto three also flew into Jerry. The Bob-omb's health was low, so he switched with Blooey. Luigi bounced on all three Phantos, and Blooey burst into flames and hit all the phantoms as well.

"You haven't fell yet? This is getting sad,

I should have beaten you, now I'm getting mad!

I've been going easy, these moves are rather plain,

Get ready to suffer because here comes the PAIN!"

Suddenly, the classical music was switched with heavy metal. The Phantos pulled out different weapons. The first had a magic wand, the second had a hammer, and the third had steel claws.

"What kind of phantoms are they?!" Blooey shouted in confusion.

Phanto one used his wand to make his buddies stronger, Phanto two pounded Luigi, and Phanto three slashed Blooey. The Blooper was badly hurt and he switched with Hayzee. Luigi slammed his hammer and created a quake that damaged the phantoms. Hayzee sang a lullaby and put Phanto three to sleep. The first Phanto summoned lightning onto Hayzee, and the second Phanto threw it's hammer into both Luigi and his partner. The plumber used a fire flower and defeated out all the Phantos.

The music went back to orchestra as the first Phanto struggled to stand up.

"I have been beaten, this is insane!

And here all of you still remain!

I guess I underestimated you after all,

Now is the time for the Phanto to fall…"

The music ended as the phantom collapsed. Guests who were watching the fight cheered and asked for an encore.

"Now to see what the phantom really looks like!" Hayzee said. He took off the Phanto mask and gasped. "PIERRE PIRANHA?"

The phantom was none other than a Piranha Plant. The plant grimaced in anger.

"Yeah that's right!" Pierre growled "I pretended to be the phantom! And I have no regrets to what I've done, you deserved it. You replaced me with that mustached guy over there because I had less talent! Now do you think I'm a better actor, huh?!? I deserve to be grass, not him!!"

"That's showbiz for you" replied Hayzee. "And what about the other two phantoms?"

"Them? They're some folks I met today who have the same hatred for the man as I do."

Hayzee took off the other two phantoms' masks and revealed them to be the female Cupcak and Neow!

"I knew I should have stuck with the lawsuit" the Cupcak groaned in pain.

"Neow?!" Jerry said in shock "why did you try to kill Luigi?"

"You should know why!" the kitten yelled. "The day of our wedding you ditched out with no letter or anything! I used to love you Luigi, now I'm furious! And you Jerry, I thought you were my friend, but you left me too!"

While everyone was distracted, Luigi took the chance to sneak out the back door.

Luigi sighed "I can't believe it. Everyone practically hates me! And to think, that Piranha Plant trying to murder for a stupid role as…"

"Grass!" a nearby Dayzee shouted "It's the grass everybody!"

Tons of Dayzees and Piranha Plants and other plant creatures swarmed around Luigi, all grass fans. They cheered "grass! Grass! Grass! Grass! Grass!"

The one who had the role of grass was surprised. The people of Jazzafrazz Town were definitely crazy. Now rather glad of his role, Luigi decided now was a good time to put in the compass piece in the compass base. The Marvelous Compass activated and made an image of a domed building, the compass pointing north.

"Hey that's the Circle Castle of Shape Land!" said a grass fan.

Another fan smacked the first one and shouted "Idiot! That's the Rapturous Ruins in Grimble Forest! Learn your locations will ya?!

The ruckus of the fans went mute as once again Luigi heard the soothing voice of Princess Éclair.

She said "he's watching……my savoir……beware…..Chestnut King…."

Luigi felt a warm feeling as he listened to her words. The feeling stopped as he heard the back door opened again and Hayzee and Pierre came out.

Pierre sighed "and to think these could have been my fans!"

"So are you going on a dangerous journey then?" Hayzee said looking at the compass. "I'll come with you, as I could use some inspiration for an idea of the next play I'm making. I'm thinking of calling it 'Extreme Tap-dancing in the Swamp of Mama Massacre.' Genius, I know!"

Luigi allowed Hayzee to come with him and the others and went to the S.S. Toaster. As the night continued on in the glamorous town, no noticed up on top of Flora Theatre was the REAL phantom!

"And so Luigi continues for the princess he needs,

Can the plumber do it? Will he ever succeed?

The journey is nearly over, so let's not get snotty,

Now please excuse moi, I have to go potty!"


	6. Enough Is A Luff

"We have arrived at the Insert-food-product-here Continent" said Flapjack to his passengers "your destination should be a mile away from here."

The group of adventurers marched their way to Grimble Forest. As they got to the outer rim of the woods, a gate blocked their path, and it's gatekeeper was familiar to Luigi.

The gatekeeper said "I am Merlon, and you are not allowed to visit the Rapturous Ruins."

"Merlon, you have to let me in, it's me Luigi!" the plumber shouted "and why are you here? I thought you were an oracle at the Waffle Kingdom."

"Oracle? You mean THAT Merlon? Pfffh, I look nothing like him!"

"Well it's kind of hard to tell if your different when you both have the same name and hoods covering your faces" Luigi muttered.

"First I get the wrong mail and now this" Merlon sighed "anyways, why do you wish to go to the ruins?"

"Because we need to find a compass piece and possibly mustachio's future wife" Blooey answered.

"Yeah" said Luigi "my future- WHAT?!"

"Don't bother hiding it" Torque spoke "we know all about your crush on Éclair. We heard it in your sleep, kissing noises and all."

"Éclair, as in Princess Éclair?" the cloaked man said in surprise "if it is to save the royal blood of the Waffle Kingdom, you shall pass. Just beware of the Grimble Forest's wildlife."

However, Merlon forgot to mention the wildlife were THE LIVING DEAD! After a couple minutes of fighting and fleeing, the gang made it through the forest.

After prying off a Dry Bone's skull off his rear end, Luigi pointed and said "there's the Rapturous Ruins!"

Luigi spoke the truth. Inside the large forest was a domed building. The group opened the entrance and were surprised when the entire interior was nothing but pure white. The place looked like a vast void, and they might have believe there were no walls until Hayzee ran into one. They then just went forward, as going anywhere else lead straight to a practically-invisible wall. After what felt like forever, they felt a door. Pushing the completely white door, Luigi and his friends entered another white place with a boy wearing old-looking rags sleeping on the floor. Curious how this child got here, Luigi walked to the kid.

"Halt, he who wears green!" something shouted.

The plumber screamed as a strange creature appeared. It's pale body consisted of only an onion-shaped head and feet, with pink pupil-less eyes and a pointy nose.

"W-who are you?!" Luigi asked the strange being.

The creature spoke "I am the watcher of these ruins. I have no real name, but you may call me 'Screamey'. And if you wish to wonder who this child is, he is Cranberry."

"So, uh, Screamey, do you think you could wake… Cranberry up?" Luigi wondered.

"I would if I could, but alas Cranberry is enchanted by a curse that makes him sleep forever. He will only wake for a child of fate."

"Wait a minute" the Blooper piped in "so this kid won't wake up from anything?"

"Besides the child of fate, yes."

Blooey went and whispered to the red Bob-omb. Jerry walked up to Cranberry and exploded! Covered in ash, the boy still slept.

"Cool!" Torque shouted "let me try!"

The Buzzy Beetle bounced on the child's head repeatedly. Cranberry still snoozed on.

"What do you think your doing, those who harm the boy?" Screamey yelled "Cranberry is not here for entertainment! HEY!"

The onion thing got extremely upset as Luigi's partners played volleyball with sleeping Cranberry as the ball itself. Meanwhile, Luigi decided to not be involved and went searching for the compass piece. It was very hard to find as the room was all white, and the Marvelous Compass seemed to be acting odd. All of a sudden, Luigi sneezed.

And Cranberry woke up.

"OH CRUD!" Torque screamed in surprise. Luigi's partners tried running away but crashed into a white wall.

The boy, uninterested why he was beaten up, stared at the man in green and smiled. "Welcome, child of fate" Cranberry said in another language. Oddly enough, everyone understood what he said.

"Uh, hi Cranberry" said Luigi, wondering how he knew what the boy said. "You wouldn't happen to know where a piece of a compass is would, you?"

The child says "Compass piece? If you are looking a compass piece then you have the Marvelous Compass! Are you aware of it's powers?"

"Err… no?"

"I see. If you wish to find the compass piece I will have to explain the history of the Marvelous Compass first."

Then Cranberry took the compass from Luigi and vanished. A few seconds after that, the ruins were changing. All around everyone, what was once white and silent nothingness soon morphed into a beautiful and noisy city. The buildings looked primitive yet artistic, and people that were the same species as Cranberry walked around wearing the same clothes the boy wore.

"What the heck is going on?" Luigi asked.

Screamey answered "this is Cranberry's explanation of the history of the compass."

"Couldn't he just tell the history himself?" Torque muttered.

Hayzee says "And not enjoy this wonderful show? Are you kidding?"

Luigi asked again "so… what is this place?"

"This is where the compass use to live in" replied Screamey "it is an image of what use to happen."

"An image, eh?" Blooey pondered. He walked into a building that appeared to be a women's hot springs, and was tossed out with slap marks all over him. "I thought images don't see you!"

"I apologize" Screamey said "I guess this world can interact with you. To make sure all goes well, I shall accompany you, he who has the compass."

_Screamey joined Luigi's party! Screamey can scream loud enough to stun others and break glass!_

The newest partner of the team led the others to the city's palace. Guards were stationed at the palace entrance, and the guards noticed the on-coming group.

One guard walked up to the gang and asked "are you the volunteering servants the Emperor foreseen?"

Luigi was about to protest, when Screamey answered "yes we are, he who guards the palace."

"Good. The royal will be having dinner shortly, follow me to the dining court where you shall serve the food."

The guard lead the new servants to their working place, only Screamey really knew what was going on. In the dining court was the royal family, the queen, the prince, and the Emperor, who held something circular in his hand.

"Ugh, what are these revolting freaks doing here?" the prince questioned in disgust.

The object in the Emperor's hand glowed. The Emperor said "they are far-off travelers who have lost their way and wish to serve us for answers."

The queen looked at the new servants and scoffed "far-off indeed. Of all the lands we've conquered, I have never seen the likes of these ones."

"Lands… conquered?" Luigi said in confusion.

"Are you that stupid?!" the prince shouted "we are the Luff Empire, rulers of nearly all of the world! How can you not know us? Huh? Answer me! Or else I will take my dagger and-"

"Enough, my son!" the Emperor yelled in displeasure "they may be inferior to us, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't be polite. They mean no harm, and if they did, I would foresee it."

Luigi began to wonder how the Emperor was 'foreseeing' everything. He looked closely at the item in the Luff's hand and gasped "the Marvelous Compass?"

"Yeah, the Marvelous Compass!" the prince began to brag "it's enchanted to look into the future! I would have enchanted something better like a sword or a crown, but even if it looks lame the Marvelous Compass helped my dad make the Luff Empire the way it is!"

The Emperor became suspicious of the plumber. "The existence of the Marvelous Compass is suppose to be secret. How do you know about it?"

The prince realized what his father meant and glared at Luigi. "Yeah, how do you know about it?!"

Luigi was trying to make an excuse. "Well, you see… erm…. uh… because…"

The queen looked outside for a moment and said "there seems to be a storm coming."

The Marvelous Compass suddenly glowed. The Emperor's eyes went small and he quietly gasped "oh no."

The leader of the Luffs jumped out of the way as a lightning bolt broke through the roof and fried the location he was just sitting on. More lightning came, smashing the dining court to pieces and zapping the unfortunate queen.

"MOM!" cried the prince, but the Emperor held onto his child.

"There is nothing we can do, my son" said the Emperor "for now, we must stop the shadow legion! Come with me to the tower!"

The father and son went into another room. Luigi and friends tried to follow the Luffs, but a large piece of debris blocked their way.

"He who wants answers" Screamey called to Luigi "we must find another way to the tower!"

Luigi agreed and smashed a smaller piece of debris to get out of the palace. Outside, it was dark and pouring, and the city itself looked terrible as more lightning damaged buildings and Luffs ran for their lives screaming.

"Hey look, Luff soldiers!" Luigi shouted "maybe they can help us get to the emperor!"

But then something seemed wrong when the soldiers had dark purple skin and attacked unarmed civilians. Luigi yelped when a dozen soldiers started coming after him! He tried to flee, but he was stuck in a dead end. But his onion-like friend had an idea.

Screamey says "Those who are not the enemy, it would be wise to cover your ears."

Then Screamey showed his namesake by screaming very, very loudly. The evil Luffs yelled in pain as they heard the scream, and nearby windows broke from the scream's high pitch. While the soldiers were recovering from near deafness, the plumber and his pals jumped into a glassless window. The area they were in appeared to be the palace's royal storage room.

Luigi browsed through the items hoping to find something useful. He found dried shrooms, star pieces, pictures of Luff girls in bikinis (which Torque took for later), and finally a pair of ultra boots. Using the ultra boots' ability to jump higher, the plumber jumped through a hole in the roof, and bounced on the palace exterior until he reached the tower. There, he saw the Emperor and the prince fighting the creator of the storm, a demonic star!

"Ha ha ha! To think you weaklings rule the world!" the star taunted as it shot a lightning bolt at the Emperor. The compass glowed and the Luff holding it dodged the attack.

"You will never defeat the Luff empire!" shouted the prince. He slashed the star with his dagger, but was knocked back by some hail.

"Do you really think you can defeat me, Disastar?" the star chuckled.

"Not if I foresee it" the Emperor muttered as he held his secret weapon. Suddenly, the Luff was hit by lightning! He was still alive, but he was very surprised.

"Father!" the prince shouted "why didn't you avoid that attack?"

"The compass… the Marvelous Compass isn't working! And the only way it can't work is if someone cursed it!"

Just then, Disastar flew by and ate the Emperor whole! "I guess he didn't see that coming! AHAHAHA!!"

"NOOO! FATHER!" the prince cried. He tried to slash the evil star, but an earthquake sent him straight off the tower!

"Looks like the Luffs are finished and the shadows are supreme" Disastar snickered. He looked to his side and saw a very frightened Luigi. "Well, well, well. It looks like I still have company. Don't be shy, I have plenty of destruction to share to all of you!"

**BOSS: DISASTAR**

Luigi began the battle by power stomping on the evil star, then Screamey screamed a wave of energy at Disastar. Disastar blew a wind of cold air at the plumber and onion-thing, and froze Luigi! Screamey screamed at the star again. Disastar hit Screamey with a lightning bolt. Luigi broke out of his ice prison and ground pounded on Disastar, and Screamey drank maple syrup to recover some flower points. The demonic star crashed into the ground and caused an earthquake, damaging Luigi and Screamey! Screamey then ate a Super Shroom to heal himself, and Luigi threw his ultra hammer into Disastar's face!

"You little pests!" Disastar spat in irritation "your whooping me and it's not even funny! But you know what will be? The looks on your faces when I perform my supernova attack!" The star closed it's eyes and began drawing in energy.

Screamey fearfully shouted "he who fights the evil star! We must defeat the enemy quickly or else we will perish!"

Luigi did another ground pound on Disastar, then Screamey switched with Blooey and the squid driller into Disastar. Disastar did nothing as he continued to draw more energy. Luigi jumped on the star twice, and Blooey tackled Disastar. Disastar was still drawing energy, but now lightning struck him multiple times, though he wasn't hurt but he was now electrified. Luigi threw his hammer again, and Blooey drank maple syrup. More lightning struck Disastar, but wasn't electrified anymore as fog started to surround him. Luigi tried jumping on Disastar, but with the fog in the way the plumber missed his target and fell to the floor. Blooey took his chance and successfully drilled Disastar. More lightning came as Disastar was drawing in energy, and the fog around him became a thick cloud shield. Blooey switched with Torque and the Buzzy Beetle used his wrench to lower the cloud's defense, then Luigi multibounced Disastar ten times. Disastar screamed in pain.

"Noooooooo!" Disastar cried "you defeated me before I could perform my supernova attack!"

"Really?" Luigi asked in tension.

Disastar said "nah, I was just messing with you" and exploded in a white light.

Luigi yelped and covered his eyes as the light swallowed him whole. He felt nothing, and when he opened his eyes he saw he was in the completely white chambers of the Rapturous Ruins. In front of him was Cranberry, who was staring at the Marvelous Compass which he held.

Cranberry said "after that attack, the Luff empire was no more. Only a few of my people survived, including me. Sometimes I wonder, what the world would be like if I didn't curse the compass…"

Luigi gasped and shouted "wait, YOU cursed the compass?"

The Luff nodded. "Yes I did. You see, I was a friend with the prince, so I knew about the existence of the Marvelous Compass. The prince bragged a lot about the compass so one night I snuck into the Emperor's room and placed a curse on it. It was suppose to be a practical joke, the compass would've been unavailable for a minute or two, but it seems the curse took effect at the wrong time. Anyways, after the attack I searched the palace ruins and found the Marvelous Compass, completely back to normal. I knew it would cause havoc in the future, so I broke it and scattered it's remains, hoping nobody would find them."

"Well you did a bad job if Luigi here was able to find them" Blooey muttered.

"Since you have completely my test, you shall receive my compass piece" said Cranberry. "Take heed, the Marvelous Compass is dangerous, and if you completely repair it please don't let it fall into the wrong hands! Now I must go, my purpose in this world is over."

And with that, Cranberry was gone, along with the entire ruins. Now back outside of the Grimble Forest, lying on the ground was the Marvelous Compass, and another compass piece.

Screamey, who was still with the others, spoke "he who uses the compass, place the piece so it may guide to the final piece!"

Luigi nodded and picked up the compass and compass piece and put them together. The compass activated and pointed north, an image of a frightening castle appearing.

"What da heck is that place?!" Torque asked.

"I have no idea" Jerry replied.

Luigi then heard Éclair again. She said "I am afraid, very afraid... The Chestnut King has kept me in his secret home of Hatesong Tower… He wants power, he wants my rule… Please, my only true love, don't let him win! Don't him hurt me!… Be careful, he is watching, ready to take the chance when you make a mistake… Save me…"

"…so then it wouldn't be my mother's place" Blooey said to the group while the plumber was listening to the princess's voice. "So Luigi, do you have any idea what this place is?"

"That's Hatesong Tower" Luigi stated "and that's where Princess Éclair is."


	7. Chestnut Kings Roasting On An Open Luigi

The S.S. Toaster moved through the northern sea. Wild waters tossed the small boat like a speeding Koopa shell between two pipes.

"Ugh, I'm getting seasick" Luigi said with his face turning the same color as his hat.

"How much longer until we reach Hatesong Tower?" Hayzee asked.

"Perhaps we would get there faster if he who has cooked skin may swim us there" suggested Screamey.

"Me? And what makes you think I can carry all you fatsos?" spat Blooey.

"Well we sure aren't goin' anywhere with this hunk of junk" Torque muttered under his breath.

"I want a taco" Jerry said. Everyone looked at him strangely. "What? I'm hungry."

"People! People!" Flapjack shouted, trying to calm everyone down. "I know my ship can't handle waters like this, that's why I've… upgraded it."

Luigi tilt his head and wondered "upgraded?"

The Waffler had a sly grin and walked to a lever nobody noticed before. As he pulled the lever down, Flapjack boomed "TOASTER, TRANSFORM!!!"

The S.S. Toaster flipped and folded until the transformation was complete. What was once a rusty old boat was now a sleek futuristic ship with rocket boosters on it's sides.

"Woah, this is some tricked out ride you have here" commented Torque "where did ya get the parts?"

Flapjack answered "I salvaged them from the remains of Turbot while nobody was looking. But enough about that, LET'S TRY THIS BABY OUT!"

The new S.S. Toaster fired up it's boosters and blazed through the sea to it's destination. Meanwhile, at the location of Hatesong Tower, the occupants were well aware that Luigi and pals were coming this way, and would make sure they had a 'pleasant' welcome.

"Commander Conker! Commander Conker!" a nut soldier shouted to a higher ranked officer "a boat has been spotted coming this way."

"They're most likely those guys A. Scorn has been warning us about" the nut by the name of Commander Conker said "Private Peanut, how soon will they be arriving."

The first nut named Private Peanut looked into the binoculars he was holding and said "very soon. I never seen such a boat go so fast!"

"Alright, then. Rally the troops and prepare the artillery, we have a ship to sink!"

"That won't be necessary, sir."

"Hmm?"

"The boat went straight in a rock."

"Oh, well, okay. Get everyone ready anyhow, we don't know how long the enemy will take to get here."

"Uh, Sir, they're right behind you."

Commander Conker turned around and saw Luigi's group jumping out of the water.

"Why didn't you mention you had no brakes?!" a dizzy Luigi groaned to the Waffler sailor.

Flapjack says "um… ships don't have brakes?"

While the group was drying themselves off, they were surprised when Commander Conker yelled "ATTACK!!!!!!!"

**MINI-BOSS: NUTTY NATION ARMY**

"Private! Bring in the tank!" ordered the commander.

"Yes sir!" said Private Peanut with a salute. A second later a large tank rolled in.

Torque started the fight by lowering the tank's defense, and Luigi whacked the heavily-armored vehicle. The tank fired it's large cannon and hit the plumber and Buzzy Beetle causing serious damage to them. Luigi jumped on the tank two times and Torque switched with Jerry then Jerry blew up next to the tank. The tank rattled and fell apart.

"Grr, send in the helicopter!" Commander Conker commanded.

"Right away sir!" said Private Peanut giving another salute. A helicopter flew in close the ground and bumped into Luigi, hurting him slightly.

The mustachioed man tried stomping on the copter but hurt by it's rotating blades. Jerry tossed three mini Bob-ombs and two of them hit the helicopter. The helicopter went high into the air and dropped multiple rocks on Jerry's head. Now all bruised up, Jerry switched with Hayzee and the flower sang a lullaby attack which did not put the helicopter asleep for obvious reasons. Luigi threw his hammer at the flying vehicle and spun out of control before blowing up.

"Argh, these guys are a pain!" grunted Commander Conker "send out the drilling machine!"

"Uh, sir?" Private Peanut said nervously "we don't have anymore combat transportation units."

"What?! All we have is just one tank and one helicopter? What I pay you soldiers for?!"

"Nothing, sir, all soldiers volunteer without pay."

"Oh shut up already! If we don't have any vehicles, I guess we'll have to fight on foot. EVERYONE, FRONT AND CENTER!"

Suddenly, hundreds of various nuts came and beat up Luigi and Hayzee. Luigi jumped twice on one group of soldiers and Hayzee slapped another group. The army pulled out their slingshots and fired thousands of pebbles in Luigi's directions, most of them missed or were blocked by Luigi. The plumber ate an ultra shroom to heal the many wounds he got from the battle, and Hayzee performed his Amazy Dayzee song which was strong enough to defeat the entire army!

"Man down!" Private Peanut shouted in pain.

"Urgh, forgive us, Chestnut King" Commander Conker groaned before fainting.

"My, that was a thrilling and dramatic battle!" Hayzee exclaimed while wiping the sweat from his forehead "let's get out of here before reinforcements come!"

Flapjack spoke "you guys continue on, I have to take care of my poor little broken Toasty. Those tank and helicopter parts may be useful, hehehe."

So the rest of Luigi's team went passed the field of unconscious nuts and continued on to Hatesong Tower. They soon noticed the tower in the distance, but the only way to get to the tower was through a very tall and dangerous-looking cliff, which made very scary noises when the wind blew on it. And the only way to scale such a cliff would be to dodge cleaver traps, solve brain-scratching puzzles, battle ferocious and strong monsters, and the of use all of Luigi and his partners' abilities! But then they found a secret elevator and used that instead.

Now that they passed through the cliff, there was nothing preventing the adventurers from entering the tower… except maybe A. Scorn who was blocking the entrance to Hatesong Tower.

A. Scorn saw Luigi and said "hello again. Normally I would fly in on my squirrel, however, Spanky's veterinarian said if he crashes into something one more time Spanky might suffer severe brain damage, so my squirrel won't be with us today. But enough about that, you are here and that makes me very angry. I shall make sure that you don't get any further! I know I say that a lot, and I never manage to stop you either, but this time it's different, want to know why?"

A. Scorn glowed as he floated while his skin turned green and he grew spiky purple hair. "THAT'S WHY!"

**MINI-BOSS: HYPER A. SCORN**

"Oh yeah baby this is gonna be gooooood" Hyper A. Scorn said in amusement.

Hayzee tried to do his Amazy Dayzee song, but failed and did nothing. Luigi used his ultra boots to jump up really high and did a special burning ground pound called the 'meteor ground pound' on the acorn. Hyper A. Scorn flew in front of Luigi and did a multiple punch combo at unnatural speeds. The plumber bopped the nut on head and the flower slapped the nut in the face. A. Scorn finished his turn by doing nothing except suddenly glowing for some reason. Hayzee slapped A. Scorn again, but Luigi didn't like the looks of the glowing and used a Boo's Sheet he carried to become transparent.

"Now to taste my hidden power" Hyper A. Scorn shouted "NUTOKEN!"

Hyper A. Scorn produced a large fireball from his hands and threw at his enemies. It passed through the transparent Luigi and hit Hayzee straight on, causing extreme damage. Hayzee was on the ropes now, so Blooey took his place and squirted ink into the acorn's face while Luigi jumped on A. Scorn twice. Hyper A. Scorn charged up again, ready to do another Nutoken in the next turn. Luigi did another meteor ground pound and the Blooper drilled in the nut's head. Hyper A. Scorn stopped glowing, then fell to the floor, then his body became brown again while his spiky hair disappeared.

"You defeat me ALREADY?!" A. Scorn shouted in anger "NO NO NO! THIS CAN'T HAPPEN! I WILL NOT LOSE TO YOU LOSERS! GRAAAAAAAH!"

The furious nut came after Luigi, but Luigi tripped him and he fell off the cliff instead.

"He's finally gone" Luigi sighed in relief "now we-"

"Wait! WAIT!" shouted A. Scorn's voice. The group looked to see A. Scorn clinging on the cliff wall, frantically trying to get up. "I WILL NOT GIVE UP THAT EASILY, AND ONCE I CLIMB UP THIS UNCLIMBABLE CLIFF, I'M GONNA-"

Blooey knocked A. Scorn off the cliff wall with a thrown rock and everyone turned their attention to Luigi while ignoring the acorn's screams.

Luigi said "we finally made it, after all we've been through we still made it. I know some of you despise me, but I'm glad you're all still by my side. Behind this door is the last compass piece, and who knows what. Our adventure might not make it in history books or even in fairytales, but it will be in my memories forever. Let's finish this!"

Blooey jumped and said "for action!"

Jerry jumped and said "for justice!"

Torque jumped and said "for fortune!"

Hayzee jumped and said "for drama!"

Screamey jumped and said "for truth!"

Luigi jumped and said "for the Princess!"

The gang cheered and entered in Hatesong Tower, right after they healed themselves. The place was completely dark and totally silent except for the cliff's howling outside. Luigi would have screamed like a baby right now, but he was too close to give up and run away now.

Jerry looked around in the darkness and said "I'll go look for the light-switch."

"You do dat, I'll just go sit on this couch" Torque as he sat on something "hmm, it's kind of hard."

"Found it!" Jerry shouted as a sound of a switch being pressed was heard.

The Hatesong Tower was soon filled with light, and everyone could see perfectly. It was a fancy looking place, with all sorts of art and Nutty Nation architecture, but everyone was currently looking at something else.

"T-T-Torque" stuttered Luigi "t-t-that's n-n-not a c-c-couch y-y-your s-s-sitting o-on."

Curious to what Luigi was scared and looked down to see he wasn't on a couch, but rather something that alive and very angry. The Buzzy Beetle was knocked off by the creature and fell next to his friends. The creature was dark brown and ape-like, had bulky muscles and sharp teeth, had green ooze coming out of his mouth, and wore a cape and crown. There was a ninety-nine percent chance this was without a doubt the terrible Chestnut King!!!

**BOSS: CHESTNUT KING**

The king roared and stomped on the ground, cracking the very floor beneath him. Luigi was pale at the sight of such a beast. The plumber shook himself and was prepared for battle.

Luigi whacked the Chestnut King with his hammer, not doing much damage as the king's body had a great defense. Blooey switched to Screamey and Screamey made a defense-piercing scream at the king. The Chestnut King ran and jumped over Luigi and landed on Screamey, temporally flattening the onion-thing. Luigi used a Thunder Bolt item to strike the king with lightning, then Screamey did another scream at the Chestnut King.

The Chestnut King made a howl to match the one outside. It oozed more green stuff from it's mouth and cling himself on the roof. While up there, the Chestnut beast spat the green goo at Luigi, poisoning the plumber.

"YOW! IT'S LIKE ACID!" the plumber yelped in pain.

Screamey gave Luigi a Tasty Tonic to cure the poison, then the man in green decided to get revenge by throwing his hammer at the Chestnut King. The monstrous nut fell to the floor with a boom, but quickly got back up for more. He walked up Luigi and flatten the Italian with one stomp. Luigi performed a ground pound on the Chestnut King's head, then Screamey switched to Torque and Torque hit the chestnut with his wrench.

The Chestnut King howled again, but this time it was more like agony than rage. The king panted for a moment, then let a barrage of toxic goo at Luigi and Torque, damaging them quite a bit but not poisoning them. Torque made Luigi's boots and hammer covered in spikes, increasing their attack power, and the mustachioed man whacked the king with his upgraded hammer. The Chestnut King roared and tried to bite Luigi, but missed thanks to a Pretty Lucky badge Luigi forgot he had on. Luigi did a meteor ground pound and when he hit his target the Chestnut King howled loudly then fell to the floor.

The king was lying on the floor, struggling to attack. But he was too weak, and just laid on the floor, breathing heavily. Luigi couldn't believe he defeated such a foe, and confidence began to grow inside.

"Alright, you no good Chestnut King!" shouted Luigi "I'm going to make sure you never do another evil deed ever again!"

With a war-cry, Luigi charged towards the ruler of the Nutty Nation with his hammer in hand. He got closer and closer, sweat pouring down his head, and his grip tightening around the ultra hammer. The valiant plumber swung his hammer, ready to crack the chestnut wide open. Then he heard a familiar voice.

"STOP!"

He stopped just as the hammer was between the Chestnut King's eyes. Luigi turned around and there she was, Princess Éclair. She, like Peach and Daisy, was human, and had short black hair, lovely brown eyes, a light blue dress, and a gold tiara with the last compass piece on front.

"You!" Éclair shouted in anger, pointing right at Luigi "how dare you barge into private property and nearly kill an innocent being!"

Luigi was surprised and confused by the princess. "B-But what do you mean?" Luigi questioned "the Chestnut King is evil and he kidnapped you!"

"Kidnapped?!? He didn't kidnap me, and he would never do such a thing, not when he's my true love!"

Luigi's eyes popped wide and jaw dropped to the ground. "TRUE LOVE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"

Blooey whispered in a sing-song tone to the partners "awwwwkwwwwward."

The poor plumber was confused and heart-broken. "But if he- then how come- if you- why is- THEN WHY WAS I SUPPOSE TO RESCUE YOU?!"

Éclair was now the one confused. "What you mean rescue? The only one who would say that would… be… oh NO! Please don't tell me HE sent you!"

"That I did, my fair princess" said an evil voice. Appearing in a poof of smoke was cabinet minister Crepe!

"No! Mr. Crepe found us!" Éclair shouted in fear. The Chestnut King growled at the Waffler, but was too weak to do anything else.

"Thank you, Luigi Mario, I appreciated the work you have" Crepe said shaking Luigi's hand, "you shall be rewarded soon enough, but for now I must punish this naughty little girl."

"Wait a minute" Luigi shouted "what the heck is going on?!"

Éclair spoke "I'll tell you what's going on, as Mr. Crepe will tell you nothing but lies! You see, a month ago, I went to the Nutty Nation to discuss territorial issues between my kingdom and theirs. I meet Chester, the Chestnut King, and we soon fell in love with each other. When I told Mr. Crepe about it, he became enraged and said I should never see the king again. I agreed, but one night I snuck out and left the Waffle Kingdom to meet Chester. Mr. Crepe noticed I was gone and when he was looking for me he saw me kissing Chester. He was so furious he turned my beloved Chester into the monster you see before you. Even though Chester was different on the outside, he was still my little nut on the inside. When the attempt to lure me away from Chester failed, Mr. Crepe convinced the entire Waffle Kingdom that the Chestnut King was a heartless beast. I became scared of Mr. Crepe and his personality I've never seen before. I began to wonder if I would never become happy again, then Chester busted in through a window and took me out of my palace. We've been hiding here since, while Chester's soldiers went to fend off any mercenaries that were looking for us. But one thing I never got was why Mr. Crepe hates Chester so much!"

"Why I hate Chester?" Crepe spat "WHY I HATE CHESTER?! I'LL TELL YOU WHY I HATE CHESTER, BECAUSE IF YOU MARRY HIM THEN YOU BECOME A QUEEN, AND WHEN YOU'RE A QUEEN I HAVE LESS POWER, AND WHEN I HAVE LESS POWER I CAN'T RULE THE WAFFLE KINGDOM! I HAVE WAITED FOR SO LONG TO RULE SOMETHING, THEN THE CHESTNUT KING COMES ALONG AND EVERYTHING IS RUINED! I ONCE HAD A CHANCE OF BECOMING EMPEROR TO THE ENTIRE WORLD, BUT I'LL MAKE SURE THAT I GET ANOTHER CHANCE THROUGH THE CRUMMY WAFFLE KINGDOM!"

Screamey heard an interesting part of Crepe's rant and said "emperor to the entire world? Are you by any chance he who was prince of the Luff empire?"

Crepe turned into his real form and said "you got that right, freak! After that stupid compass was cursed I was knocked out for nearly nine hundred fifty years! I wake up to in this strange new world to find the Luff empire practically wiped out from existence! Luckily, I've been training in magic to help get through in life. So I blend in, brown nose the right people, and I'm Mr. Crepe the cabinet minister guy! You guys may think I'm going a little crazy and power hungry, but you don't know what it's like to be the son of a guy who has the world bowing to him! I should have slit my father's throat if when I had the chance."

"Mr. Crepe… or whoever you are!" the princess shouted "what makes you think you'll achieve anything over ruling the Waffle Kingdom? My kingdom doesn't have the power to go up against the rest of the world! Please, consider your actions!"

"SHUT UP GIRL! I AM SICK OF BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO! I HAVE WAITED FOR TOO LONG FOR POWER UP UNTIL THIS MOMENT BUT NOW I WILL BRING THE LUFF EMPIRE BACK FROM THE GRAVE AND MAKE YOU ALL MY SLAVES! NOW WITNESS YOUR WORST NIGHTMARES COME ALIVE!"

"NO! ANYTHING BUT LUIGI IN A DRESS!" Jerry gasped, then said "uh, I mean, err, giant rotting demon that eats babies, yeah."

The prince closed his eyes as he floated while a portal opened below him. Evil Luff spirits came out of the portal and skittered throughout Hatesong Tower. The furniture and everyone else were lifted off the ground and spun in an invisible tornado while was tower was ripped apart. Liuigi, his partners, the king and princess landed on a large chunk of flooring was now in the sky with spirits and bits of the tower circled around while a giant portal circled below. The prince of the Luff empire opened his eyes and screamed as he shape shifted into a humongous skull with blue flames for eyes and thousands of black tentacles squirming out of his mouth!

**FINAL BOSS: CREEPY CREPE**

"KRAHAHAHA" laughed the skull "ALL WILL BOW DOWN TO THE LUFF EMPIRE!"

"Yeah right!" Torque shouted "come on, Luigi! Show this punk who's boss!"

Luigi nodded and agreement and jumped on Crepe twice. Torque made Luigi armor to increase the plumber's defense. Creepy Crepe shot laser beams from his eyes and hit Torque, flipping the Buzzy Beetle over. While his friend was trying to get back on his feet, Luigi whacked the skull with his hammer. Crepe licked Luigi with his thousand tentacles, not doing much damage as Luigi had his armor on. Torque finally flipped himself up, then Luigi ground pounded Crepe.

"My, what fierce fighters you are" Creepy Crepe said with a chuckle "this shall be a fun battle!"

The skull used some magic to confuse Luigi. Torque hit Crepe with his wrench, then Luigi took out his hammer and whacked Torque!

"Oops, sorry!" Luigi apologized.

"A fun battle indeed!" Creepy Crepe laughed.

Crepe shot eye lasers at Luigi. Luigi's armor disappeared, and the plumber tried to jump on Crepe but defended due to his confusion. Torque switched with Jerry and the red Bob-omb tossed three mini Bob-ombs at the giant skull.

"Wait a minute" pondered Creepy Crepe "why should I fight you if I have minions of my own? LUFF SPIRITS, I SUMMON YOU!" Four Luff ghosts came to the skull's side. "I have to make plans for when I'm Emperor of this world, you just play with my friends for just a minute."

Crepe left Luigi and Jerry with the ghosts to fight against. Three of the ghosts attacked the plumber, and the fourth ghost attacked the Bob-omb. Jerry caused a giant exploded which eliminated the spirits easily. The giant evil skull came back, and noticed his minions were gone.

"Oh boo hoo, you destroyed all of my servants" Crepe sobbed sarcastically "BAH! Doesn't matter, I can just bring out more!"

And he did, four more ghosts appeared by his side. The skull then used a spell that boosted his attack power and defense. Luigi defeated the Luff ghosts with a multibounce, then Jerry blew up next to Creepy Crepe. Crepe did a magic spell that burnt Luigi and Jerry with flames. Luigi ground pounded Crepe while Jerry tossed three more mini Bob-ombs. Crepe left the battle as more minions came to be his replacements. Jerry drank some maple syrup, then Luigi tried to multibounce on all the Luff spirits, but lost momentum on the third. The remaining spirit disappeared then reappeared as four spirits. Luigi jumped on one, but went through it as it was just an illusion, Jerry gave Luigi a Super Shroom to heal some wounds. The other three spirit images attacked Jerry at the same time. Jerry switched out with Screamey, who used a scream to attack all the Luff ghosts. The real ghost was soon revealed, and Luigi jumped on it and it was defeated.

Then Crepe came back again. "It seems my minions are too useless to fight you. Perhaps they are better shields than weapons? Let's find out! LUFF SPIRITS, PROTECT YOUR MASTER!"

Hundreds of spirits surrounded Creepy Crepe, making a ghostly bubble around the skull. Luigi jumped on the ghosts, then Screamey screamed at the ghosts. Their attacks defeated a couple of spirits, but there was still hundreds more protecting Crepe, who licked Luigi with his tentacles. Screamey swapped with Blooey, who drilled into the ghostly group to knock off a couple of poltergeists by the second. There was now a huge gap in the shield, and Luigi used that gap to meteor ground pound Crepe directly.

"ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE!" Creepy Crepe yelled as he tentacle-whipped away all the Luff spirits. "I SHALL SHOW NO MERCY TO YOU NOW!"

Blooey taunted "Oh yeah? Give me your best shot!"

After the squid said that, a large laser beam came and fried him more than he already was.

"Ouch" said Blooey before fainting.

"Anyone else want some?" the skull sneered.

Luigi swapped Blooey with Jerry and Jerry blew up next to the creep while jumped on Crepe. Creepy Crepe fired another beam and knocked out Jerry. Torque replaced Jerry and whacked the skull in the skull, then Luigi did a ground pound on Crepe. Once again, another beam came and defeated Torque. It was Hayzee's turn as he sang a lullaby and failed while Luigi whacked the skull with a hammer. Crepe fell down, and when I say Crepe I mean Hayzee as he got hit by a laser beam. Screamey came to the plumber's side as he screamed at Crepe, then Luigi meteor ground pounded Creepy Crepe. Do I even have to explain what happened to Screamey?

Before he knew it, Luigi was all alone against a scary looking skull. There was no way he could finish off Crepe now, so he defended and hoped for the best. Creepy Crepe fired another laser beam when something knocked Luigi out of the way. Luigi wondered who saved him, and was shocked when it was the badly hurt Chestnut King!

"Chester!" Éclair gasped.

Crepe growled "the Chestnut King! You disgusting beast, don't interrupt!"

The beastly king stood up, blocking Luigi from the angry skull.

"So you want to be a hero, eh? Let's see how good of a hero you are when your DEAD!"

"NOOOOO!!!"

Princess Éclair jumped on top of Crepe and attempted to stop the skull from hurting her true love.

"GET OFF GIRL!" Creepy Crepe shouted.

"NEVER!" replied Éclair.

The skull shook itself, trying to lose the princess off of him. The only thing that fell off was her tiara, which landed next to Luigi. As Crepe shook, he was so busy he didn't notice the Chestnut King grabbing some of the skull's tentacles and pulled on them. Creepy Crepe had enough of this, so he quickly spun around, knocking Éclair and Chester to the ground. The couple didn't even get a chance to scream when a laser beam sent them lying down motionless.

Crepe took a deep breath and said "now… where were we…"

He turned to face the man in green, and gasped in utter shock. Right in Luigi's hand was the Marvelous Compass, glowing a glow Crepe has only seen a thousand years ago. The skull wondered how that was possible, then he looked at Éclair's tiara on the ground and noticed the compass piece was gone!

"You repaired the compass" Crepe said in amazement, then he snapped himself out of his trance and spoke gruffly "SO WHAT! I'll still destroy you!"

Creepy Crepe launched a laser beam, and Luigi easily dodged it.

"Grr! You were lucky that time, this time you're a goner!"

The skull shot another beam, then another, then another, then another. The plumber jumped around and dodged them all.

"So you can avoid my lasers, big deal, I have plenty of other attacks I'll gladly use!"

Crepe used magic spells, Luigi dropped them. Crepe sent out Luff spirits, Luigi evaded them. Crepe threw pieces of Hatesong Tower, Luigi avoid them. Crepe used every attack he heard and not one of them hit Luigi. The skull's fire eyes burned brightly.

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I. WILL. CRUSH YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Creepy Crepe then used himself to destroy Luigi. The skull charged at the plumber, but Luigi gets out of the way and Crepe ends up crashing into the ground instead. This goes on repeatedly, and the predator was hurting himself instead of his prey. In a mere ten minutes Creepy Crepe was exhausted and his skull was badly cracked. Taking the advantage, Luigi walked up to Crepe and poked him. The skull screamed in complete pain as it broken apart. The spirit of the Luff prince came out of the skull and flew around, wailing in agony. The ghost fell off the platform that was currently in the sky and fell down to the portal down below.

The Luff's last words in the living world were "I can't believe I gotten beaten by LUIGI!"

When the prince went through the portal, all the other ghosts that were floating around went into the portal too. The objects that were spinning in the air lowered to the ground, and Hatesong Tower formed itself back together as if it was never torn apart in the first place. Everyone else soon woke up, completely healed of all damage. The only exception was Blooey's double fried skin.

"Sorry that you got roasted again, Blooey" Jerry said in a comforting voice.

The Blooper looked at his skin and shrugged. "You know what? I actually like this body extra crispy! Yeah, plus girls love a guy who's tan and handsome!"

"Well that's good to know."

The princess stood up, looking around and not finding the Chestnut King anywhere. She called "where's Chester?"

"Here I am!" said a cute-looking nut wearing the king's clothing.

"Chester! You're back to normal!" Éclair shouted. The two ran up to each and hugged, then they kissed.

"How romantic!" swooned Hayzee.

"Yeah" Torque replied "I wonder if we'll get paid."

Screamey walked next to the plumber, who was stilling holding the Marvelous Compass. "Congratulations, he who saved the day! The compass is completed and our quest is over! If you don't mind, I need the Marvelous Compass. I have been sent here to protect it and I must fulfill my purpose."

Luigi gave Screamey the compass without looking at him. The Mario brother was currently too busy staring at the loving couple of Éclair and Chester.

"Let's go" was all Luigi said as he walked out of Hatesong Tower. He stood near the edge of the cliff and saw the sun rising. The plumber sighed, now wishing he had the compass for a little longer. He wanted to look into the future and see if this journey was worth it, because the only reward he gained was misery.


	8. The Marvelous End

A few days later, our hero Luigi was back at home in the Mushroom Kingdom, still rather down in the dumps. He was so depressed he didn't even notice that the house was a mess, half the furniture was gone, party decorations were everywhere, and a drunk Bandit was lying under the table.

The Bandit woke up and mumbled "urg… how long have I've been passed out? OH SNAPZ, TEH OWNER IS BACKS!" The close relative to the Shy Guy then stood up and jumped through the window.

The plumber was snapped out of his unhappy trance when he heard someone say "mail call!" outside. Getting out of his chair, Luigi went out to check the mail the Mario Bros. received. There was only one letter, and it was addressed to him! He opened the envelope and read the message:

_Dear Luigi, it's your sailor friend Flapjack. Thank you for saving the Waffle Kingdom and Princess Éclair. I'm sorry you had to do Crepe's dirty work, I didn't know he was evil and crazy. Besides that, I just wanted to report in on how everybody's doing._

_Blooey has become a model for 'Mermaid Magazines' and he's quite a hit thanks to his crisp tan. He's considering going on an adventure for his vacation, and he invited you to come if you don't throw him into lava._

_Jerry decided to become a police officer in Plumpbelly Village. There has been Kremling criminals going about in the Strudel Continent and Jerry has been making sure justice is served. I hear he has a girlfriend too, some cat named Neow, I think that's pretty cute._

_Torque gave up trying to get you to pay up when you obviously didn't have the money. Besides, he has a new business making battle boats. Maybe I should enter the S.S. Toaster in a battle boat contest someday._

_Hayzee Dayzee and Pierre Piranha worked things over and are now practicing for a new play. It's called 'The Girl And Her Boyfriend Who Turns Into A Monster Because A Wizard Did It.' Yeah, I think Hayzee needs to think of better titles for his plays._

_Screamey said to me he was going back home with the Marvelous Compass, about how it he has to deliver it or whatever. His friends later came and picked him up after we were done talking. Hey Luigi, while I'm writing I just want to know if there's any country that uses UFOs for transportation._

_And as for the Princess and the Chestnut King, they're going to be getting married! Everyone in the Waffle Kingdom and Nutty Nation are so excited, including me! It's going to be so beautiful!_

_Me? I'm just doing what I usually do, sailing and all. We may never see each other again, so I guess I should say it was an honor to serve you in your quest. You are a great man, Luigi, and while you have your flaws you also have your perfections._

_Going back to duty, Flapjack._

The hero in green smiled as he finished his letter. He went into his secret room underneath the him and his brother's bedroom and opened up a chest. It contained items that were a part of his special memories. He put the letter in with the other objects and closed the chest. After leaving the secret room and going into the living room, he saw Mario come in.

"Your back from your treasure hunt are you?" Luigi asked "how was it?"

And so for the rest of the day, the two Mario brothers told each other their crazy adventures.

_**THE END!**_


End file.
